“I chased a daydream and woke up by the sea”
I’ve always been different.
For the longest time, I felt that I didn't quite fit in but later learned I am able to adjust anywhere. I wasn’t made to settle into one place so I feel most inspired when I’m traveling or experiencing a new adventure. From a young age, I have always felt that I had an old soul. I sense a deep understanding of life and strive to see the big picture of every situation. With that, as I’ve grown, I've struggled through challenges that life and age has brought me. But throughout those times, I have always known there was a reason for these struggles and have tried to take away a lesson from each one. At times, life is quite difficult, especially because I'm pursuing a career that is not drawn-out or straightforward.
I always had an interest in observing things and consider myself a visual learner . Around the age of 16, I started taking photos for my school's yearbook and fell in love with the task, specifically portraits. It was such a developmental time in my life. I consider myself an extrovert now but when I was younger, I found it very hard to connect with others and struggled with social anxiety. Photography really allowed me to come out of my shell and presented opportunities for me to build a future. I started college majoring in journalism but quickly switched to filmmaking. The transition was natural and it enabled me to express and speak through a new medium, film. I have always admired the magic of movies growing up and it was so cool to be able to study something that I never thought I’d have the opportunity to be a part of while living in the south. I can’t imagine finishing college if I had majored in anything else.
Like many, I dealt with bullying growing up and found myself to be an easy target. But as I grew more into my own and stopped caring so much of what others thought, I realized that I had a knack for modeling. To me, modeling is more than just standing in front of a camera and trying to look pretty, I love the art of expression. I’ve been told before that I exhibit a since of confidence in front of camera that I don’t carry around otherwise. I guess it’s because I feel more comfortable in front of a camera than people. It’s a sense of therapy for me because I feel like I’m allowed to be whatever I want in front of the lens that I wouldn’t otherwise be able to be. When shooting other people, I always tell them not to stress, it isn’t a big deal and to just have fun with it. Over time, that is the attitude I’ve adopted.
"To me, modeling is more than just standing in front of a camera and trying to look pretty.
I love the art of expression."
While growing up in the deep south, acting was never an option but I always dreamed of doing it. Photography allowed me to come out of my shell and led to modeling and filmmaking. As I was learning about scripts, character development and directing along with my knowledge of how things look on camera, I naturally picked up acting. Now that I live in Los Angeles, I am free to peruse opportunities that will let me expand this new craft.
I’m first to admit that I’m never really sure of what I’m doing, but who does? People will always try to fit things into their own understanding and I feel that I’m constantly given options of what I “should” do. Honestly, I do care what others think, almost too much sometimes, where I struggle to find my own voice. But what I’ve learned is that you can’t make everyone happy and your life is YOUR only chance around so you have to ultimately do it the way you want. I’ve been told constantly that I need to pick one thing and stick with it or I won’t succeed. But I simply cannot function that way. I’m constantly growing and changing and don’t see why my interest or expression of art shouldn’t as well. I've never conformed and it has gotten me this far, so why stop now, you know? And I didn’t come this far to be shoved into a box and do as I’m told.
"Often times I think I may be a little crazy because the way I think and perceive things isn’t shared by the people I’ve found myself around. But I think it takes the right amount of madness to see the world just differently enough to change it. "
One of my big inspirations is James Dean. I love how he was a symbol of masculinity and a rebel. I constantly find myself feeling on the outside marching to the beat of my own drum. I also admire his iconic timeless style. And with my own style and expression I like to ride the line of masculine and feminine qualities.
And I think the world needs to keep a sense of mystery. So many people move to L.A. to be someone else but I moved here to become more of who I am. And I've learned that success really comes with perseverance. It's a gift to be a nobody in a city of "somebodies". It allows the freedom to move around the city and develop your own voice so that if and when you get the platform to speak you actually have something to say. And it is very true that life is about the journey not the destination.
"I always tend to be drawn to the grays in life, nothing is truly black and
white. In the grays, we find the complexity of life. No person or situation is as simple as it seems.
That’s the fun in trying to dive deeper into it."
I have struggled a lot with depression in my life.
What has gotten me through the lowest parts is the idea that I am loved regardless by the One who made me. My perspective is that life is a mosaic of good and bad. And that together creates an image of God that we can spend our whole lives learning about. And if we are created in his image, we can spend our life continuing to learn new things about ourselves. That is what drives me and why I always desire to fully experience what life throws at me.
Faith is a big aspect of my life. It's as if we are all on a big map trying to find our own way. No one fully knows the right way but we are all trying and all you can do is help those you meet along the way. I am a Christian who believes in a personal relationship with a God that created us. And in that I find the beauty in life, that we were created with so much complexity that our purpose is to live and experience life to the fullest. No one is perfect, but that’s not the point. Imperfection is a beautiful example of love because God loves us regardless and He will let us work things out on our own.
Aside from faith, the greatest sources of my inspiration for creating come from music, cloudy days and novel adventures. What I'm listening to is certainly reflected in my work so I love projects that evoke a mood.
I believe that artists reflect the world as they see it. So with an image that I create, I’m able to share with others how I see the world.